Who knew way back then about the real benefits of Tapping?

I’ve been fooling around with the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), or “Tapping” as it is being called by more and more people, for several years. I’ve been able to get myself through some pretty tough times with it, once I got past the “silliness” of tapping various points on my head and body while I said some statements out loud. But I never did it on a regular basis, and I didn’t experiment with listening to different experts take me through their particular tapping routines. I guess you could say I was a tapping dilettante.  I believed in it, I did it when I was in trouble, but I didn’t talk much about it to people who might look askance at me when I tried to explain it.

Pieces of Fluff

All this changed when I decided to make the commitment to fully participate in the 2011 Worldwide Online Tapping Summit in February. I tapped faithfully every day with the two daily experts, and a funny thing happened. As I experienced each person’s approach to tapping, I began to learn what worked best for me. And as I tapped along with them, little pieces of fluff that had been stuck in my subconscious, waiting for just the right moment to spring out and attack me — well, they just seemed to disappear.

Mind Blowing

And then there were two truly mind blowing experiences — one after a tapping session about half-way through the Summit and one during a tapping session near the end of the Summit. I suddenly “got” on a very deep level that I had a choice about all this, pardon me, crap I was letting abide in my subconscious. I have spent many years and many dollars dealing with all this crap – too many modalities to list here. And progress has certainly been made. But down deep, I was still longing for some miracle that would allow me to release this deeply buried belief that I was, after all, damaged goods, and nothing I could do would ever change that.

Well, guess what — I was wrong.  I experienced something that is a bit difficult to describe, but since I’m a writer I’ll give it a try. What happened was that a thought that was so strong it pushed everything else aside said to me very clearly, “This stuff about being damaged goods is just crap. You can choose to let it go.”

Becoming Truly Free

The first time this happened was after a tapping session. I was sitting on my comfy blue couch in my office, looking out the windows at the beautiful landscape of the valley below us. That thought came to me, and then suddenly the light in the room turned very bright. I felt the immense power of my thought all over my body in a tingling fashion, not unlike some experiences I have had in deep meditation. And I had a Knowing that this was true and that this would change my life in the way that I had been seeking for so many years.

The second experience occurred during a tapping session with Nick Ortner a few days later.  There was something about the way he approached it — or maybe it was just that I had picked up so many pieces from all the other experts and it all came together right then.  Instead of just standing there looking out my window, tapping along with him, I suddenly had that deep Knowing once again. The light in my office became very bright again. And I heard my thought clearly say — “This crap is over. You are free.”

Tapping, Then and Now

So, it is now two days later as I write this post, including a picture of myself as a little girl dressed for my tap recital, a picture I always hated because I was too skinny, I wasn’t as good at tapping as the other girls, I wasn’t pretty enough compared to my friends — all that stuff that has been so deeply embedded in me since I was a very young girl and my father filled my head with all this propaganda. I’ve always envied other women who could put up pictures of themselves as little girls, while my shame at not being good enough or pretty enough kept me locked in a prison of my own making.

As I said earlier, I have worked on this and many other issues for decades. It is only because of all this work that I am still here on the planet. But, doggone it, I was really getting tired of working so hard and still dragging this crap around with me — and I felt like I was running out of time. Maybe this is why I decided to really commit to the tapping this time.

Now, I understand that I will still need to continue to tap — there are all sorts of things still lying around to be dealt with, not just by me but by any regular human being who is not damaged goods.  But now I know I can tap on anything that comes up with the confidence that I can find it, tap it, and watch it dissolve like a sugar cube in water.

Out of the Closet

So – I am finally coming out of the Tapping closet, like so many other people are doing now – because I finally know what they know – this tapping stuff works, big time.

The Summit has ended, but you can still get some free audio bonuses from the event:

You can get free audios from the Tapping Summit Packages by clicking here.

]]> http://www.kat-tansey.com/2011/03/tapping-for-emotional-freedom/feed/ 7 http://www.kat-tansey.com/2010/10/on-being-a-brazen-hussy/ http://www.kat-tansey.com/2010/10/on-being-a-brazen-hussy/#comments Mon, 25 Oct 2010 19:03:06 +0000 Kat Tansey http://www.kat-tansey.com/?p=402

When I was growing up, oh so many years ago, I was told that good little girls are seen and not heard — but somewhere along the line I decided I really didn’t want to be a good little girl, and I’ve been pretty loud ever since.

However, this imprinting still holds me back when it comes to asking for help in getting my message out there.  Somewhere in the dark recesses of my mind is that idea that I should not be pushy, that people will not like me, that they will think I am a brazen hussy.

This old brainwashing has me on the horns of a dilemma with regard to getting my book, Choosing to Be, out to the world in a big way. I know from all the feedback that the book makes a difference in people’s lives. Everyone who reads it loves it, the reviews on Amazon are amazing, and Findhorn Press is behind me one hundred percent. And — we are making progress.

But when I see something like this latest review of Choosing to Be, I get that fire in my belly again, that Don Quixote spirit to once more get out there and tilt at those windmills.

These are the kind of messages I receive about what this little book means to people who are struggling just like I was.  I know that over $40 BILLION DOLLARS  is being spent on antidepressants. I see the ads on TV telling people to just take this little pill and they will be all better. (Yes, sometimes medication is needed, but  it is not the only solution.) I see too clearly and painfully that we have lost our collective minds to have allowed big pharma to brainwash us on a daily basis — without so much as a whimper. (TS Eliot had this one right…)

Before I saw this Amazon review on Sunday, I was feeling a little discouraged. I started writing Choosing to Be about my journey out of depression over 17 years ago. I finally finished it and self published it in 2007, slugging it out on my own to get reviews and media mentions for 2 years. And then Findhorn Press decided to pick it up and put out a beautiful new edition. It is wonderful that now I am not alone on the plains like Don Quixote — but this still isn’t enough. We are not reaching nearly enough people to turn the tide.

Shortly after reading this review, I got an email from book marketing expert Steve Harrison about making a Quantum Leap to really get your book out there. He said we need 3 things:  1. Burning desire, 2. Resources, and 3. Willingness to Change.

I’ve got the Burning Desire. I have some of the Resources and can probably get more if I ask for them. Ah — the Willingness to Change, there’s the rub.

What is holding me back? Right, that old childhood fear of being a brazen hussy.

And then I finally got it. (Thanks, Steve) Most, if not all, of the women I really admire have probably been called brazen hussies, and much worse, in their time. What am I so afraid of?  Who the heck cares?

So — I took this Amazon review that once again lit that fire in my belly, and sent it to my friends and the people I have helped get their message out — and I asked them to help me get my message out.

And you know what, not one of them called me a brazen hussy. They just supported me like I was a good little girl . . .

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See more reviews for Choosing to Be on Amazon

Let’s pretend the Still Point is a place, a dot on the map of your consciousness. Do you know where it is? Do you have any roads leading to it? Or is it a tiny pinprick, lost in a sea of busyness, drifting about with no anchor, far from shore?

In today’s busy world, it’s easy to lose our connection to the Still Point, and the further we get from it, the less it even occurs to us that we might need to visit it – because, after all, we have THINGS TO THINK ABOUT! THINGS TO DO!

When I hear people say they have tried to meditate, but it is just too hard, I know they have forgotten about (or maybe never knew) the inestimable and necessary beauty of the Still Point.

What is the Still Point?

Each of us will describe it differently, but here is what it is for me –

It is moment in time when I let go of my need to be absorbed in my thoughts, when I step back and simply observe them floating by like ripples in a stream.

I feel my body sink into the chair, my spine relax, the heaviness of my hands on my lap.

My breathing becomes deeper and smoother, and I am aware of the sound of my breathing in and breathing out.

Gradually (and the amount of time this takes can vary from a few minutes to half an hour), I am able to let go of my stream of thoughts. I become aware of the sounds in the room, of my body in the chair, of the PRESENT MOMENT.

I may see some colors or lights or other visual effects. This does not always happen but when it does I welcome it. I may also feel a warm tingling all over my body.

Sensations come and go. Thoughts come and go. Moments of complete peace come and go. Moments of ecstasy come and go. Nothing lasts. Nothing needs to last. I am part of the larger stream, letting it carry me and remind me that I am always part of it.

Eventually I return from the Still Point.

I drink a big glass of water and make a few notes about my visit. When I am finished, I leave my journal on the small round glass table next to my large overstuffed deep red chair. I fold my tattered and much beloved brown shawl and place it over the arm of the chair, put my shoes on, and walk back into my busy life, with the memory of where I have been to enrich and sustain my everyday world.

Postscript:  A Metaphor about the Still Point from Inside Our Magnificent Bodies

I am reminded of the conversation I had on Finding Magic in Midlife with Dr. Joan King, a former neuroscience professor and author of The Code of Authentic Living: Cellular Wisdom. She coaches people in how to be guided from deep inside, from our own cellular wisdom. As we were talking about the fast pace of our world today and the excitement of being able to have access to so many people through social media like Twitter, I made the comment that this constant stream of input made me feel overwhelmed at times.

Joan and I discussed her chapter called Turning On and Turning Off in which she addresses this very issue. Here is the wisdom from our cells:  After the neurons are stimulated and release their transmitters they go into a quiet phase that is 3-4 times as long as when they were active. You see, when they are active lots of charged molecules are moving out and charged particles are moving in.  The cells have to re-equilibrate and move things back into place (sort of like catching up with your filing). During this time, the neuron is completely still.  If you force the neuron to fire during this restorative still time, it dies.

This is a perfect metaphor for our external lives. If we are constantly busy, if we don’t take time for silence and regain our equilibrium, nothing will be integrated and we will burn out. We will lose our connection to the larger source, our creative ability, our sense of peace and well being – our restorative connection to the Still Point.

Footnote: The Still Point in a Turning World is a line from T. S. Eliot

Have you ever bought a present for someone that you just couldn’t stop playing with? That’s what happened to me when I bought the Mirage, an instant 3-D hologram maker. You put this little plastic pig in the bowl, put the top on, and the pig appears to be sitting on the top of the bowl — but it’s not, it is only a hologram.

I now have this Mirage maker sitting on my desk, and every so often I reach over and try to pick up the pig, and every time I am re-astonished at how real the pig seems until I touch it.

The same thing is true of our “stories” isn’t it? They seem so real, we just know they are real, this is what really happened to me, we scream silently. But if we tell our story, or better yet, write our story, and ask someone who is not involved to listen to it or read it, and ask them to give us their view of it, or ask us questions about it, what do we find? It is just a story. We have personally arranged all the mirrors, just like this they did with the Mirage maker.

This is how the Mirage makes the pig appear real. The mirrors have to be arranged just a certain way, and they have to be polished for it to work. Hmmm, sound familiar? We have been arranging and polishing those mirrors for years. And then, if we are very lucky, someone moves one of the mirrors just a bit, and the pig disappears. Wow! Been carrying that pig around all my life, and now it’s just gone. What a miracle!

I actually arrived at this idea about the mirrors before the Mirage came into my life, when I was writing the chapter on Anger in Choosing to Be. I was having trouble explaining how meditation eventually helps us get out of our Ordinary Mind (the Mirage) and into Buddha Mind.

I was writing the dialogue between me and Poohbear Degoonacoon, the Feline Zen Master, in which he was trying to help me break free of my story, the one that was coming up repeatedly like a bad movie in my meditation. Pooh said that I was caught in the Wheel of Samsara (suffering), reliving the same events over and over again. He told me that the way to get of the wheel was to “become curious about this anger and this hurt and this humiliation. Do not participate in the scene. These feelings you are having are not you. Do not be overcome by what is happening in it. Step back and look at it from a distance.”

Several days later, the same scene came up again in my meditation. This time I did what Pooh suggested. I became curious, asking myself about the texture and tone of the feelings, and how my body was responding to them. I saw that my stomach would tighten, and I wasn’t breathing. I took a deep breath, and then another.

The story was still present, but the scene had shifted, as though I was looking at it from another angle. It was just a story about a woman who as a young girl made a decision that it was not acceptable to speak her truth. I saw how my story could morph and change in an instant, as if I was in a hall of mirrors and I just moved a few inches to the right — and got a completely different picture.

Of course, there are lots of books and techniques we can use to help us get out of our stories, but I find myself getting pretty attached to the pink pig that is not sitting on top of the bowl on my desk. Guess I’ll have to go back to the store to get another Mirage for that present I still owe my friend.

I have a confession to make. I don’t always meditate every day, even though I tell everyone they should.

What happens to me is what happens to most of us. We have every intention to stop, to sit still for brief time, to just be. But life gets going, we get revved up, and the day slips by before we know it. We smack our foreheads on the way to bed and say “Oops, I forgot to meditate today!”

I wrote a book about learning to meditate, and I wrote an e-program about how to become a confident sleeper, so, for the most part, I practice what I preach. Not to be goody-two shoes perfect, but because I really do understand how I benefit from doing what I tell other people to do.

But I get sloppy. I convince myself that as an experienced meditator who knows the value of it, I will remember to sit every day – but this really isn’t true. I go on automatic pilot, get through the entire day, and smack my forehead on the way to bed, just like everyone else.

When I was talking with my coach about how I was having trouble with my spiritual connection, she asked me how often I was sitting. Big (huge) light bulb moment! There is a direct correlation between how often I meditate and how connected I feel to my spiritual source.

At her suggestion, I changed my practice from that of “I know I will remember to sit every day because I write about this and I’m a seasoned meditator and I’m really cool with this, thanks” to something really brilliant. I decided to set a time that I will meditate every day. Okay, snicker if you want. I’m just trying to be honest here, even if it makes me look like a bit of a doofus.

After I implemented this brilliant plan, I sat every day, usually for 45 mins to an hour. I did this for 10 days. Here is what happened during that time. I slept really well every night. I was open and creative, and completely concentrated and focused when I needed to be. I loved myself and those around me. I was inspired and inspiring. I was connected to my spiritual source. In short, life was great!

And then one day, I “forgot” to meditate. It wasn’t on purpose. I was out running errands and didn’t get back in time, and then it slipped my mind that day.  The next day, I managed to sit but not at the appointed time. Slippery slope. In an amazingly short period of time, I had reverted to my former hit and miss approach.

And guess what? Didn’t sleep as well. Not as creative. Not able to focus like before. Striving for spiritual connection, but feeling like it eluded me. Inspiration was a distant memory.

What have I learned from this fall from grace? Simply this, it really was a fall from grace.

Do I want grace? You bet. I love grace. I love the way it makes me feel. And I know how to get it. Every day, at the appointed hour, all I have to do is Sit.

And say to myself every day that what is most important is most important. Act on it. Every day. My life will work better, I promise.

I am pleased to announce that a new Edition of Choosing to Be will be published  in September 2010 by Findhorn Press, one of the world’s leading independent publishers in the fields of spirituality, healing, and self development. They are located in northeast Scotland, and publish works by authors living all around the world, distributing their titles worldwide.  Many of their titles have been translated into one or more languages.

This is a mock-up of the new cover.  It is much brighter and, and according to the Independent Publishers Group who advises Findhorn about their planned releases, more marketable than my original cover.  My dream has always been to have Choosing to Be in the hands of readers around the world, and I am delighted to be in the hands of a publisher who can help me realize that dream.

In the meantime, you can see the great Reviews about the book by going to the Choosing to Be tab on this website. And of course you can always pre-order it at Amazon.